University Diaries, Episode 8: I Want To Be In A Relationship, Everyone is in ONE.

*Clears Throat*…….This was not what I was supposed to talk about today, in fact, it was not part of the topics I have down for this diaries but I don’t think I can do away with this topic.

You see when you enter university, it is A BIG PLACE…but when you don’t take care you would not fit. Moreover, most people enter university in their late teens specifically 17, 18 years onwards. At this stage, we all know our hormones are up and we want to have someone to call our own….something more than just friendship…a romantic relationship.

I am aware that in some countries especially in Ghana when the first years arrive, the guys in level 300 and 400 are all over them and want to grab their catch. The wisdom is in knowing those who should not make it past a hello and those you should completely avoid. This is especially to the girls…because in this instance we are always the ones who are victims in this circumstance.

I have heard stories of young girls who came all the way from back home (Africa) from very good homes to school here in the UK who have ended up getting pregnant in their first year just because of a relationship which should not even have begun in the first place. The truth is most people, especially guys, have fun with these relationships and it is nothing serious…It is normally termed as ‘help me pass my course/graduate type of relationships’. Now, I am not saying ALL relationships are like this but to be honest not so many relationships that start in university make it to engagement not to talk about marriage (my opinion).

Now let me put this here: You will not die if you are not in a relationship whilst in university and it is not weird. I understand that sometimes the pressure is real…I have felt it because most of my friends were and it looked nice…but that should not be. We must get to a point where we stay focused on the topmost priority at every stage in life. It is better to be single and have maximum time for your studies than being in a dead end relationship which will give you nothing than headaches and heartaches and end up diverting your attention from your books. Every other thing is secondary. I remember an older friend of mine kept on pestering me with questions of being in a relationship and what not…I kept on giving her the same answer as NO but she would not have it…And I wondered why? I explained to her I don’t need it and I don’t think it is necessary at this point in time. When the time is right, it will happen. Of course, she still was not convinced because as I am, I have to be in a relationship by hook or crook especially with all the guys on campus…but who said I was looking at them..or they were my focus? (This is where you see that our society is messed up….everything must be about getting a man, married and what not *rolls eyes*).

To all the young girls out there still pursuing their degrees and even to the guys who may feel pressured to be in a relationship just because that is the order of the day…don’t be fooled…they might NOT be as they seem to be. Even if you see someone you would like to pursue or be in a relationship with, do so with wisdom. Don’t spend all your time with this person when you know you have courseworks to do and exams are around the corner. Don’t go over the top with things. Make yourself and your parents proud by always making sensible decisions. Put some *respeck* on your name and value yourself. First things first…Getting that degree done and dusted first, everything else WILL fall into place.

Thanks for reading…Let me know your thoughts!



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